Thank You RI City Council--Not! or, Nothing runs like a Deer

I'd say they deserve the Darwin Award, but this is not a funny situation. In honor of the spirit of the season, our local city council has voted to give us death and destruction for Christmas. Today, an ordinance allowing deer hunting within city limits went into effect. We have a lot of "city deer" wandering around. To date, I know of know accidents with in the city from hitting them. They are eating a few dead twigs and plants here and there. A couple people claimed a doe tired to paw them; we didn't ask if they had hit the egg nog a bit early or not. I can think of plenty of accidents that could happen with hunters a little to happy to zing that arrow in the sky. Couldn't we have just staged William Tell in one of our local theaters? When we had coyote running around, no one thought to hunt them. In fact, Animal Control was pretty clear they were not responsible for anything coyote ugly or pretty, and they stay far away from all wild turkeys [the bird kind; we can't speak for the bottled kind]. The raccoon population is out of control; they walk brazenly into peoples' houses. Those of us who still have an ounce of common sense think that a bite from one of these animals, especially if they are rabid, would cause more harm than the deer. We have moles and their relatives everywhere, and our yards are like tunnels. Yet, nothing is ever done about these varmits. Really, it wouldn't take deadly weapons to control them. Live tracks do the trick. It's a cold, bleak winter thus far. Not many feed the deer. They will die off naturally. What's worse, we have bow hunters running around. I plan on researching what it takes to get a bow hunting license. Please don't send me angry commnents. Honor the First Amendment, and read on. Killing things is not apparently enough. We have been conducting a new and negative urban renewal policy around here. Lincoln School, a landmark, was taken out of private hands because the owner was not "taking care of it." Ultimately, it was demolished; evidently, taking care of a historic building means introducing it to a wrecking ball. The empty lot where a 100+ year old school once stood is much better. This week, after some sinister machinations and a suspiciously broken boiler, Audubon school was detroyed. There were offers to buy it; the city turned them down. It paid three times as much to have it destroyed. Where did all the Audubon prints inside go, I'd like to know? And where did the Japanese Friendship dolls disappear to? I break my own rule and end a sentence in a preposition to make a point and attract readers' attention. I fear for our Civil War fort, and for the antique statues in Webber Park. Perhaps the Mayor won't like the way they are looking at him. And, speaking of Justice and The Bill of Rights, there are plans to tear down the historic courthouse being laid. They have already been defeated in at least one voters' referendum, but we are persistent in our efforts to make us all one happy big box store. By the way, we are getting our own Walmart. Yet another school building, this one rennovated by a community college, may go bye-bye. The City looks away as businesses here for generations close, and their buildings stand empty. People trying to rennovate old, elaborate structures run out of funds, or have trouble getting money. Strip malls replace history everywhere. We are becoming an urban blight ghosttown as more people move out of our city and into one of the surrounding communities. This is my home, or I would leave. I won't be driven out, though I fear if any of the Council sees this, a little holiday retaliation may come my way. So, thank you Honored Members of the Council for gifting us all with death and destruction this Christmas. Ho. Ho. Ho. Ho. When is the next election?